Effectively Ineffective

As trendy as it is nowadays for someone to have “anxiety” or “panic attacks” in the face of never ending Starbucks lines, a wrong food order, or even missing out on the latest batch of Kylie Jenner lip kits, I’ve been battling both issues for quite sometime. Perhaps even a dash of depression, but I attribute that to being seasonal for the most part. (I’m a pasty-white Irish gal that lives for the sunshine, sunburn blisters and all! (Thank you Aloe Vera for saving my life!))

I never really wanted to admit my problems it to myself, or anyone else for that matter, because admitting I needed help meant I was weak and couldn’t handle my life on my own.  I was able to self-medicate whether it was with Xanax “borrowed” from a friend, a pipe of nature’s finest greenery, or even a strong adult beverage.  Something to calm my nerves and make my brain momentarily numb.  Obviously, after time, that backfired.  I was creating waves where they had no business being.  My once harmonious, perfect home life was now on the verge of crumbling.  All because I was being a raging twat from not sleeping due to anxiety and anxiety due to not sleeping.

After another glorious day of arguing and screaming matches, I had had enough.  I made a call to schedule an appointment with my primary care doctor to talk about my insomnia and anxiety.  After the appointment was made, I reached out to a few individuals I knew that had experience with therapy and related issues.  I wanted inside knowledge and to know what I would be up against.  While reaching out to these wonderful people, I had realized that self-medicating was a-okay, but not in the way that I was going about it.

After hours of research and a few lessons learned, I decided I was going to work on introducing a few new activities into my daily life.

  1. Meditation – even for just a few minutes a day, this is my time and no one can take that away from me.
  2. Valerian Root – this is an all natural way to help me fall asleep and so far so good!  I take 1-2 pills about 20 minutes before bed and I sleep like a rock for most of the night.  There is a slight adjustment period to the pill, but after one or two nights I felt the immediate effects.
  3.  Nature therapy – I love hiking, gardening, and just being outdoors.  I’m going to make sure to dedicate more of my time to just becoming one with Mother Nature.
  4.  21 Day Grateful Challenge – I read that if you can name 3 things you are grateful for for at least 21 days, you can reprogram your brain to be happy.

It’s safe to say that after my research, I didn’t go to my scheduled appointment.  I want to try and heal myself on my own terms rather than getting doped up and sent away. These are just a few small steps I’m taking to try and get myself back on a path of love and happiness.  It’s not that I ever strayed too far from the path, but I just took a minor detour along the way.  A detour that was a bit more stormy than I was prepared for, but thankfully I have a wonderful support system that hasn’t strangled me yet.  That let’s me know that there is still hope!

Word of advice, my loves — asking for help doesn’t show weakness or lack of ability to cope with your life.  It takes courage to make those first few steps.  But also know that there is more to helping than becoming numb due to prescriptions and therapy a doctor might recommend.  Do your research and see what positive changes you can try to make for yourself or introduce into your routine to help improve your outlook.  We’re the Millennial  Generation with a wealth of knowledge at our fingertips.  We’re more connected to the world than we ever have been before.  You’re not alone ❤




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