Category: My Shit Show Life

• Jeanette McCurdy stole my book idea. Not really. But kind of. I’m excited to buy her new book called “I’m Glad My Mom Died” because I have a sneaking suspicion that, although I’m not a childhood tv star, we’ll have things in common. It appears my mom was able to overcome COVID, even after the…

  samuraisamiam

  August 21, 2022

  abuse, caregiver, COVID-19, death, depression, Exes, Family Dysfunction, hospice, My Shit Show Life

• How do you know…

  When you’re ready to jump back into the potential dating scene? Not like “Let’s go get married” expectations, but someone to enjoy their company, have a plus one to events, and maybe even get naked on occasion? Is that a thing? No, I’m not talking a fuck-boy, I mean a grown-ass man who has his…

  samuraisamiam

  July 21, 2022

  covert narcissism, depression, Exes, Family Dysfunction, mental health, My Shit Show Life, Narcissism, narcissists, podcast, Self Help, Therapy, Trauma, Trauma-Bonding

  dysfunctionalfamily, escaping a narcissist, living with a narcissist, mental health, mental health awareness, Narcissism, Self Help, surviving narcissists, Therapy, Trauma

• Sunny Side Up

  I am officially all moved into my mom’s place, with the exception of a few items we’ve yet to exchange or are still finding, but that’s going to happen on MY time. Everything important to me is already moved. The cats are freaked, as to be naturally expected. My male cat, Eddie, poofs, hisses, and…

  samuraisamiam

  July 18, 2022

  covert narcissism, Exes, My Shit Show Life, Relationships

  covert narcissism, Narcissism, Self Help, self-help

• BYE FELICIA

  It’s been a week since I’ve written about “feeling normal” and holy shit has that been a rollercoaster of emotions. Last weekend, I spent majority of it in my old home while he and kiddo were gone. I wanted time with my cats, who are still there, and wanted to pack things my way, on…

  samuraisamiam

  July 14, 2022

  anxiety, baby mama drama, caregiver, covert narcissism, death, depression, dying, Exes, Family Dysfunction, mental health, My Shit Show Life, Narcissism, narcissists, Self Help, self love, Therapy

  anxiety, covert narcissism, depression, emotional abuse, emotional abuse survivor, mental abuse, mental abuse survivor, Narcissism, narcissists, Therapy

• The End is really the Beginning

  We’re finally into the second half of the year, something I’ve been looking forward to since before the start of 2022 because all signs are pointing to it’ll be amazing and make up for the last few years of crap. I’m waiting for that “amazing” part to kick in because on Saturday July 2nd, my…

  samuraisamiam

  July 11, 2022

  anxiety, depression, Exes, Family Dysfunction, Guilt Trips, mental health, My Shit Show Life, Narcissism, Relationships, Self Help, self love

  breakup, covert narcissism, emotional abuse, mental abuse, moving on, narcissist, separation

• Truth = Freedom?

  Hardly. I’ve been trying to live as my true, unabashed, unfiltered self for some time now and for the most part is has absolutely served me well. I’ve been able to set boundaries in my unhealthy relationship with my mother, I’ve cut out certain toxic people, and have been focusing on MY future more, versus…

  samuraisamiam

  June 15, 2022

  caregiver, death, depression, dying, Family Dysfunction, My Shit Show Life, Rant

• Stuck in the Matrix

  I finally spoke my truth. My mother has this innate ability to get under my skin without even saying as much as a word, but I genuinely intended our interaction yesterday to be pleasant. And it was. Until she decided to comment about her having a panic attack due to having to ask me to…

  samuraisamiam

  March 29, 2022

  anxiety, caregiver, death, depression, Family Dysfunction, Guilt Trips, mental health, My Shit Show Life

  anxiety, caregiver, confessions, depression, dysfunctionalfamily

• Well Past the Expiration Date

  I wish she would just die already. That’s not the first time I’ve thought that and it certainly won’t be the last. The “she” in this case is my mother. I’m sure your first thought is “Wow, that’s awful, how could anyone wish that?” while your second thought is likely about how much of a…

  samuraisamiam

  March 24, 2022

  death, Family Dysfunction, Guilt Trips, hospice, mental health, My Shit Show Life

  caregiver, COPD, depression, hospice

• It’s the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine.

  It’s Thursday, December 30th. Two days left in this shit-show year. All signs point to 2020 and 2021 being the ramp up or trial run for whatever is coming in 2022, but I’m choosing to just try and focus on the here and now. Easier said than done, amiright? It doesn’t help that two separate…

  samuraisamiam

  December 30, 2021

  Adventures, anxiety, depression, diabetes, Exes, Family Dysfunction, mental health, My Shit Show Life, Rant, Stepmom Chronicles, Witchy Woman

  anxiety, confessions, depression, selfhelp, tarot, Therapy, year in review

• Here Comes the Waaambulance.

  TW/Suicide . . . My mother was officially released from Hospice on Monday, 11/8/21. On Tuesday, 11/9/21, she tried taking her own life by swallowing pills. To say this is all surreal is an understatement. I received a panicked call from A, my brother’s gf, about what to do – told her to call 911…

  samuraisamiam

  November 11, 2021

  anxiety, caregiver, death, depression, Family Dysfunction, hospice, mental health, My Shit Show Life

  anxiety, depression, dysfunctionalfamily, hospice, suicide, suicide prevention, Therapy